How to know when potty training or toilet training is complete

What happens after daytime training?

Here's something important to know: daytime toilet training and nighttime dryness are completely different milestones.

Many people expect that once their child is toilet trained during the day, nighttime dryness will follow quickly. Often, it doesn't. And that's completely normal too.

Nighttime dryness is largely about physical development. Some children's bodies are simply ready earlier than others. You can't force it, and pushing too hard can create stress and bedwetting anxiety. Which can create other issues. So be patient and know:

• Most children develop nighttime dryness between the ages 3 and 7

• Boys often take longer than girls

• If your child is still having nighttime accidents at age 5 or 6, that's okay and nothing to worry about

• When they're ready (and their body is ready), they'll stay dry at night.

In the meantime, use nighttime nappies or pull-ups without shame or stress. Your child is still learning. This is still progress. I found that wearing their pants on top of the nappy/diaper helped to differentiate this phase. I only found out for child number two though!

After nighttime dryness comes: a period of adjustment where your child learns to wake up when they need to go, or learns to hold it through the night. This happens naturally as their body develops. It will happen in its own time.

Daytime toilet training and nighttime dryness are two separate and important milestones. Nighttime dryness is primarily about physical development and will happen naturally when a child's body is ready.

Real-life tips that worked

Here's something I learned that made a real difference: children are motivated by seeing people they admire doing the same thing.

As you go about your day, point out toilet use casually:

• "Grandma uses the toilet too!"

• "Mickey Mouse uses the toilet."

• "Look, that person in the street is maybe going to use the toilet."

• "Peppa Pig uses the toilet, just like you!"

Whatever relates to your child's world - people they know, characters they love, things they see around them. Make it normal and aspirational. You're not saying "you should do this because everyone does." You're saying "look how many people you admire do this. You're joining them."

But choose your role models wisely. Don't use classmates or friends as examples unless you know for absolute certain they're solidly toilet trained. If your child thinks their friend is still in nappies/diapers and then sees them with them, that can create confusion or even regression. So only use examples that ring true to your child's actual experience.

The goal is to make toilet use feel like something normal, achievable, and even a little bit exciting. Like joining a club of cool and capable people.

Use role models the child admires and knows well - perhaps you could casually point out that Grandma, Mickey Mouse, or other trusted figures use the toilet to make it feel normal and aspirational.

When to pause toilet training (and why it’s okay)

Sometimes you start toilet training and realise: this isn't working. Your child isn't ready. And that's okay. If this happens, remember three things:

Wait: Each Child Develops at Their Own Pace

Forcing toilet training before your child is ready can actually prolong the process. It can create anxiety around the toilet, power struggles, and setbacks. There's no prize for starting early. There's only your child's wellbeing (and your sanity).

If your child isn't ready, pause. Wait a few months. Try again when they show more signs of readiness. You're not giving up. You're being smart and supportive.

Postpone if Necessary: Medical Issues Come First

Sometimes toilet training needs to stop because of something physical. Constipation, viruses, digestive issues - these are real, and they matter.

With both my own children, we started toilet training and we had to stop at the first stage, on the advice of the doctor. You'll know that viruses and bugs are very common with kids, and they almost always appear at the most inconvenient times! Trying to toilet train while they were dealing with that would have been wrong; it's both cruel and counterproductive.

If your child is struggling with constipation or you suspect a medical issue, see your doctor. Get it sorted, then try again when they're physically ready. You're not failing. You're being responsible and putting them first.

Don't punish and be kind: Accidents are part of learning

This is worth repeating: accidents are a normal, necessary part of toilet training. They are not your child being difficult. They are not your child being lazy. They are your child learning.

Never punish an accident. No shame, no anger, no "you should have known better." Just: clean up, move on, try again tomorrow.

Your child is doing their best. And so are you.

Don't force toilet training before your child is ready. Waiting a few months is far better than prolonging the struggle and creating stress.

Never punish accidents. They're a normal and necessary part of learning, not a reflection of your child's ability or your parenting.

The most important thing to remember

Toilet training is a journey, not a destination. There will be good days and there will most certainly be hard days. There will be progress and setbacks. There will be moments when you wonder if it will ever happen...

But it will. Your child will learn. You will make it through. And one day, you'll realise you haven't thought about it in weeks.

You've got this. And your little one's got this too.

You're doing great - even on those messy days.

Remember, toilet training is a big milestone - and worth celebrating!

Toilet training is a journey with progress and setbacks. Trust the process, and remember you're doing great, even on the tough days.

Where else can I get support and advice?

Every child’s toilet-training journey is different, and sometimes it helps to hear from a range of experts and professional organisations. This site is based on my own experiences and advice I found helpful as a parent, so If you’re looking for more tips, research-based guidance, or reassurance from trusted sources, the links below are a great place to start.

These websites offer practical tools, medical perspectives, and step-by-step support that many families find helpful:

The National Health Service (UK)

The official NHS advice on potty training, readiness signs, and dealing with common challenges. Clear, calm, and medically trusted.

ERIC (The Children’s Bowel & Bladder Charity)

Expert guidance on constipation, nighttime dryness, and continence support. A brilliant resource if your child needs a little extra help or reassurance.

BBC - Tiny Happy People

Short videos and simple, easy-to-follow guidance developed with child development specialists. Perfect for quick encouragement.

CDC – Developmental Milestones & Toilet Training

Helpful information on child development, including potty training readiness and behaviour patterns across toddler years.

Zero to Three – Potty Training

Research-based articles designed for parents, with practical steps, emotional support, and expert-led videos.